Will and Elizabeth's Married Life
by purplediamond7
Summary: Now married, Will and Elizabeth are living comfortably in Port Royal, but life can never be tedious when visits from Captain Jack Sparrow are inevitable! Please review, it might be better than you think!
1. The Preparations

**Will and Elizabeth's Married Life as Seen by Captain Jack Sparrow**

Declaimer: no, I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean, and if I did I would change the second movie very much.

**The Preparations**

"...and as captain of a ship I can, in fact, perform a marri-age..."

-Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest

"Father," Elizabeth Swann said, "Will and I are going to get married next month. I have a favor to ask you. Can you suspend the laws about piracy just for the day of my wedding?"

"Why?" Weatherby Swann questioned.

"Because we invited quite a few people who would instantly be hanged for piracy if they turned up here."

"Like who?"

"Well, Captain Jack Sparrow, obviously; Bootstrap Bill, that's Will's father; Davy Jones and his crew, we decided to invite them to the wedding instead of going through the tedious job of getting rid of them; Barbossa, remember him; and the whole crew of the _Black Pearl._Oh, and by the way, Jack is going to be performing the ceremony."

"What?!"

"Well, he's a captain of a ship so he can perform a marriage ceremony."

"Is there any use arguing with you?"

"No, I would have thought you know that by now."

"All right, have it your way."

"You'll suspend those laws, then."

"Yes, yes,"

Please review! You'll be appreciated!


	2. The Second Wedding

**Will and Elizabeth's Married Life as Seen by Captain Jack Sparrow**

Declaimer: again, I do not own Pirates of the Caribbean

**The Second Wedding**

"You are the bride of my dreams..."

-Anne of the Island

The day of Will and Elizabeth's wedding day dawned. Elizabeth hoped this time around they would actually get through it without any trouble. How little she knew.

She came to the fort in a corset, even thought she should have known better by now. She was wearing a gorgeous white dress, beautifully arranged veil, and a bouquet of pink roses. Captain Jack Sparrow, looking as disreputable as ever, was ready to conduct the ceremony. Governor Swann cast him a disgusted look. Will took Elizabeth's hand and led her up to Jack. Bootstrap Bill came over to Governor Swann, who looked, if possible even more disgusted.

"We're in this together, ain't we?" Bootstrap asked. "Your lass, my lad." Elizabeth's father nodded. "She's a pretty lass, I've always wanted a daughter. I'll have to be content with a daughter-in-law."

Meanwhile, Jack was saying "Elizabeth Swann, do you take this man as your lawfully married husband?"

"Aren't you supposed to ask Will first?"

"I'll take that as a 'no'" Jack said.

"No, no, of course I do."

"That's better. William Turner, do you take this woman as your lawfully married wife?"

"I-I can't breathe," Elizabeth gasped, staggered, and fell over the edge of the parapet. Will rushed forward, about to dive after her, but Jack said, "It's fine, I'll rescue her." He asked with a grin, and dived over. He dragged Elizabeth out and slit open her corset, reviving her. After this repeated adventure, Elizabeth was in no condition to get married because the water have been very cold, and she was rather blue, both in physically and in spirit. She woke up the next morning with pneumonia. She nearly died of it, but of course she recovered.

Reviews? Please?


	3. The Third Wedding

**Will and Elizabeth's Married Life as Seen by Captain Jack Sparrow**

Declaimer: tragically, do not own.

**The Third Wedding**

"She was a happy and beautiful bride...slender and shining-eyed, in the mist of her maiden veil, with her arms full of roses."

-Anne's House of Dreams

"Somehow, something always happens...just before things get to the very worst."

-A Little Princess

Three months later, everyone was standing in the same place, Elizabeth once again in a corset, though she _really_ should have known better by now. Jack was once again conducting the ceremony.

"I hope this works out at last," Elizabeth said.

"Third time's the charm, love." Jack told her.

"William Turner, do you take this woman as your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do." Will said.

"Elizabeth Swann, do you take this man as your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do." Elizabeth said.

The rings were on and Jack said,

"I now pronounce you man and wife."

Everyone drew an huge breath of relief, and Will and Elizabeth kissed. Suddenly Elizabeth stiffened in Will's arms. He drew away in alarm.

"I-I can't breathe," she gasped, and fell over the edge.

"I have to save her again, don't I?" Jack asked. Everyone nodded. "Ah, well, getting used to it now." And Jack dove into the water in order to rescue her before things got really bad.


	4. New Arrivals and Eunuchs

**Will and Elizabeth's Married Life as Seen by Captain Jack Sparrow**

Declaimer: still don't own...

**New Arrivals and Eunuchs**

"...bathed in the wonderful glory that comes to a woman when her first-born is laid beside her."

-Anne of the Island

A year after their marriage Jack visited Will and Elizabeth. Everyone in Port Royal was inordinately relieved that they were safely married. Jack strolled, or more like strutted to Will and Elizabeth's manor house. Elizabeth had a huge dowry and Will got rather rich off the treasure of Isla de'Mueta a few years back, so they lived a very comfortable life, but not at all agreeable, according to Jack. He knocked on their door. A servant opened it.

"May I inquire as to your business here?" the servant asked, eyeing Jack's rather picturesque appearance.

"I'm here to see the Turners," Jack informed him.

"They are currently eating dinner, but you may wait for them to finish."

Jack rolled his eyes in irritation.

"I don't care what they're doing, I'll not be kept waiting." Jack said, shoving past the servant.

"Excuse me, but you can't just--" the servant began, but at that point Jack lost his patience. He had had enough. He spun around, pointing a pistol at the servant and cocking it.

"I'm Captain Jack Sparrow," he told the servant. "Savvy?" He then pushed into the Turner's dining room.

"Jack!" Elizabeth and Will exclaimed at the same time, standing up. They were the only two in the room, but according to Jack, this wouldn't be for long. Elizabeth was showing definite signs of expanding the family.

"William, Lizzie," Jack said, almost lazily.

"Don't call me that!" Elizabeth cried.

"Come and sit down," Will said, beckoning Jack over to the table. Jack collapsed into one of the many unoccupied chairs around the table, next to Elizabeth.

"Have any rum around?" Jack asked.

"We have a couple of bottles in the cellar, just in case you come along." Elizabeth said. "Will, can you go get them?"

Will came back with the bottles in a minute and set them in front of Jack, who uncorked one lazily.

"So, how's life been for you two? Not bad as I can see," Jack commented, slinging an arm around Elizabeth's shoulders, and laying a hand on her swollen belly.

"This isn't Tortuga, Jack," Elizabeth said, "besides, not in front of Will."

Will looked plainly horrified. Jack and Elizabeth burst out laughing.

"It was a joke, Will," Elizabeth laughed. "I just couldn't resist it. Oh, I love you, Will," she said affectionately, reaching across the table and brushing a piece of hair out of his face.

They had a very satisfying evening, catching up on each other's news. That is, it was pleasant until Jack got so drunk, he fell asleep in Will's favorite armchair, and spilled rum all over Elizabeth's best carpet. Elizabeth got so mad, she threw the bottle and the rest of it's contents into the fireplace, which promptly exploded. Jack woke up briefly, muttered,

"Why's the rum gone?" and fell back to sleep.

The next morning, everyone was in a bad mood. Jack had a splitting headache, Elizabeth was mad about the fireplace and very nauseous, and Will was upset that Elizabeth was upset.

"So, Lizzie," Jack said over breakfast.

"Don't call me that!" Elizabeth half screamed, her voice bordering on hysterical.

"As I was saying," Jack continued. "Where'd you get the baby?"

"What?"

"Will's a eunuch, so who's the father?"

The next second, Jack was running out of the house and down the street, various dishes and vases flying after him. A priceless family vase was smashed to pieces on the street outside the Turner's house. Jack, meanwhile, raced onto the _Black Pearl_and gasped to his incredulously gaping first mate Barbossa:

"Cast off, come on, we need to get out of here!"


	5. Religion and Retirement

**Will and Elizabeth's Married Life as Seen by Captain Jack Sparrow**

Declaimer: The sun is still rising in the west and I still do not own PotC

**Religion and Retirement**

"What soft-headed lubber had a Bible?"

-Treasure Island

"Blessed be the cheesemakers..."

-Life of Brian

A few months later, around Christmas, Jack came to visit Will and Elizabeth again. Things had definitely changed. Elizabeth had died in childbirth, taking the baby with her. Will, completely broken-hearted, drank his way through all his money and now lived in a run-down shack on the outskirts of Port Royal. Okay, just kidding. Will and Elizabeth(who was still comfortably alive) were still living in their manor. Jack came to find out how the baby was. He didn't even know if it was a boy or girl. He strutted up to the door of the Turner mansion. Will and Elizabeth had fired their previous servant, so now a new one came to the door when Jack knocked. He felt rather proud of himself for knocking, and not bursting his way into the house.

"May I inquire as to your business here?" the servant asked, and just like his predecessor, eyed Jack mistrustfully.

"I'm here to see the Turners," Jack drawled.

"They're eating dinner now--" the servant began, but Jack shoved past him and straight into the dining room.

"Jack!" Elizabeth and Will exclaimed.

Jack sprawled in one of the empty chairs, put his feet up on the table, and nibbled on a shrimp.

"Where's the new addition to the family?"

"Well, actually," Elizabeth said, "they're twins. A boy and a girl."

"What are they named?"

"That's the problem." Will said. "They were born a week ago and we can't decide on names."

Elizabeth brought her babies in to show them to Jack and Will got the rum.

"I have a solution to your problem," Jack told them. "Name the boy after me, and the girl Jacklyn, shorten it to Jackie."

"Perfect!" Elizabeth cried. "We wanted to name the boy after you, because you married us, and you're such a good friend," Will coughed delicately. "but we couldn't think of a name for the girl."

"Well, it's just lucky that I happened along then," Jack said. "Oh, yeah, I have Christmas presents for you two." He produced a sword for Will which was made out of solid gold with an emerald set in the handle. While Will was still consumed in speechless admiration, Jack give Elizabeth an amber necklace with a bracelet to match.

"Oh, Jack," Elizabeth exclaimed. "This is beautiful!"

"This sword is gorgeous!" Will cried. "It must have cost you a fortune! Where did you get it?"

"I shoulda known you would ask that," Jack said regretfully.

"Jack! Oh, you surely didn't steal them!" Elizabeth said.

"I'm a pirate, love. What'd you expect? Now, please, don't start! If you don't like where your presents came from, give 'em back, but I suggest you pretend Will didn't ask that question."

"Let's do that!" Will agreed.

"Good idea, let's try all this again! Oh, Jack! How can we thank you for them?"

"Don't even try to, love," Jack said expansively.

"Listen, Jack," Will said. "Is it any use asking you not to call my wife 'love'?"

"No," Jack said. "Or would you prefer me to call her something else? I can think of something."

"No! Please don't!" Will cried.

"Jack," Elizabeth said. "Do you want to come to church with us?"

"NO! Is that how you're trying to thank me?

"Actually it was just a suggestion," Elizabeth said.

"Don't you know that I hate churches! The incense! It makes me choke! And the wine they serve! It's revolting! It's not even proper wine! And the services! They are such a waste of time! And boring as all hell!" Jack raged.

"It was just a suggestion," Elizabeth said weakly.

"For God's sake, I'm a PIRATE! I've probably broken all ten commandments more times than I can count! Besides, I'm not even Christian, so the commandments don't apply to me!"

"Jack, please--" Will began, but was cut off by Jack.

"That is it!" he bellowed. "I come here with the innocent intension of giving you Christmas presents and instead of thanking me you try to rope me into religion! No, I'm not staying under your roof for another moment!"

And with that he stormed out of the house, leaving a dumbstruck Elizabeth and Will behind him. Then Will leap up and grabbing a bottle of rum, ran to the door.

"Jack!" he called. "Jack! Come back and have some rum!"

The pirate captain hesitated for a second. Then the rum won. He came back.

"You're not going to try to persuade me to convert?"

"No, I promise."

"Oh, all right," Jack agreed cheerfully.

"But, you know, Jack," Will remarked, "You did marry us, so you must be at least a little bit Christian."

"No more religion!" Jack yelled, brandishing his bottle of rum threateningly. "Besides, you can't be a little bit Christian. You're either Christian, or you're not, and I'm under the 'not' category."

"Does that mean we're not legally married?" Elizabeth asked tremulously.

"NO!" Jack screamed. "You most certainly are! I'm not going through all that again!"

"I should hope not," Will said.

"Well," Elizabeth said. "How about we give Jack his Christmas present."

"You know what," Jack said, "I don't think I want a Christmas present. I mean, I don't want a _Christmas_ present. I'd much prefer a some other holiday present. A Christmas present sort of implies I'm supposed to celebrate the birth of Jesus, which I don't. I mean, no one celebrates my birthday (except for me and the people I invite to the celebration), so why would I celebrate someone else's?"

"You didn't die for the sake of the people, Jack" Elizabeth said.

"Huh," Jack said. "Is there any _proof_ that Jesus even existed?"

Will and Elizabeth stared at each other.

"Ha!" Jack cried. "You know I'm right!"

"If we listen to you for another minute, we'll have no convictions left." Will said.

"Are you quoting _My Fair Lady_?" Jack asked.

"Let's just call your present a winter holiday present, and we'll give it to you before you manage to destroy our faith." Elizabeth suggested.

"You know what," Jack said. "I'll need to have a talk with the priest in that church up the street."

"NO!" Will and Elizabeth cried in unison.

"When _is_ your birthday, Jack?" Elizabeth asked. "I notice you didn't invite _us_ to the celebration."

"It's on the 7th of July," Jack answered. "And about the celebrations, I kind of neglected them for the past few years. I'll start celebrating it again, and invite you. Oh! I remember why I stopped celebrating my birthday! I lost track of how old I was,"

"You couldn't have, Jack," Elizabeth cried. "How old were you on the last birthday you celebrated?"

"I drank too much rum that day, I can't remember." Jack answered, frowning.

"See?" Will said. "Drinking rum never leads to anything good."

"I don't see anything bad about not knowing my own age. Then no one will tell me that I need to go into retirement."

"Do pirates retire?" Elizabeth wondered aloud.

"Certainly we do!" Jack cried. "If we live to see the time."

"What do retired pirates do?" Will asked interested.

"Well," Jack said hesitantly. "No one really knows, as there wasn't yet a pirate who survived to retirement age."

"So you'll be the first?" Elizabeth asked.

"No, haven't you been listening?" Jack asked. "I won't retire at all, I'll go on pirating forever."

"Well, how about that present, Jack?" Will asked.

"A winter holiday present, not a Christmas present?"

"A winter holiday present," Will confirmed.

Elizabeth brought down a small box. Jack opened, and found a ruby ring. He slipped it on his finger.

"It's pretty," he commented. "Thanks." Then he turned over the card attached to the box. His face went purple.

"Jack, what is it?" Elizabeth asked. Jack, meanwhile, got up and walked deliberately out of the house. Elizabeth looked in horror at the card, wondering what was so dreadful that it made Jack walk out on them like that. The back of the card said _Merry Christmas._

_Review, you'll make the world a better place!_


	6. More New Arrivals and Names

**Will and Elizabeth's Married Life as Seen by Captain Jack Sparrow**

Declaimer: Somewhere over the rainbow skies are blue and the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true...Somewhere over the rainbow I would own Pirates of the Caribbean. Most unfortunately, this is not somewhere over the rainbow.

**More New Arrivals and Names**

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet..."

-Romeo and Juliet

"...whore that I am..."

-Helen of Troy, The Iliad

Six months later, Jack came again. He walked up to the Turner mansion. Will and Elizabeth had again fired their previous servant, so now a new one came to the door when Jack knocked.

"May I inquire as to your business here?" asked the servant. Jack wondered if there was another phrase they could use. This one was getting on his nerves.

"I'm here to see the Turners," Jack answered with infinite patience.

"They're having dinner now, but--" the servant began. Jack wondered, as he shoved past the servant, whether Will and Elizabeth were having dinner all day long, or if that was just at the time of his visits.

"Jack!" Will and Elizabeth exclaimed in surprise. Their twins were sitting on high stools. As Elizabeth came forward, Jack could see that they would soon have another baby, very soon, to judge by the way Elizabeth looked. Jack looked over at the twins. The girl was chewing on a napkin with great concentration. They both almost black hair, even darker than Will's.

"You're not mad about the Christmas thing, are you, Jack?" Elizabeth asked tentatively.

"No," Jack assured her. "That was funny, alright."

Elizabeth picked up her babies and brought them closer to show Jack. He tweaked Jackie's nose and tousled Jack's dark hair. Both twins clapped their hands joyfully.

"Well, they certainly recognize me as their namesake," Jack said.

The Turners and Jack had a very enjoyable evening. Jack got rather drunk and decided to stay the night. Elizabeth gave him the spare bedroom. Jack noted with displeasure that the wallpaper and bedclothes were lavender. He abhorred lavender. Making note to tell Elizabeth to try another color, he went straight to sleep. Jack slept very peacefully until about three o'clock at night. He was wakened by a low moan and the sound of anxious voices from Will and Elizabeth's room. Jack jumped out of bed, and as he didn't bother to take his clothes off the night before, ran to the Turner's room. Now, any decent person would have called through the door and asked what was wrong, not come barging into a married couple's room. But then, since when has Captain Jack Sparrow been a decent person? Well, he barged into their room, alright. He found Elizabeth lying on the bed moaning and heaving for breath. Will looked frantic.

"What's the matter?" Jack demanded.

"Elizabeth's in labor!" Will exclaimed.

"Well, if you hadn't gotten her pregnant, she might not be in labor now," Jack commented sourly, as he was not in a good or reasonable mood. He strongly disliked being woken.

"Jack!" Will exclaimed indignantly. "Can you please get a midwife?"

Eventually, Jack got the midwife and Elizabeth successfully gave birth to a girl.

In the morning came the problem of a name.

"How about Anne?" Jack suggested.

"That's a good one," Elizabeth said. "But maybe we'll think of a better one."

"Helen?" Will asked.

"I hate the legend of Helen of Troy. She was a terrible slut. But, if you want me to look at your daughter and think 'slut', go ahead."

"No! Please," Elizabeth said. "What about Amber?"

"That's ridiculous. I hate jewel names."

"Jack, this isn't your child. Besides, your ship is the _Black Pearl_." Elizabeth noted.

"The _Pearl_'s a ship. There's a difference."

"I like Lily," Elizabeth said.

"I don't much like flower names," Will said. "How about Wilhelmina?"

"Who on earth is going to be able to pronounce that?" Jack demanded.

"We'd shorten it to Mina," Elizabeth said.

"But she'd still live with the terrible knowledge that she has an unpronounceable name." Jack remarked.

"Well, why not Lucy, then?" Elizabeth said.

"Did you pick the names of the main female characters in _Dracula_ on purpose or accidentally?" Jack asked.

"You've read _Dracula_?" Will demanded incredulously.

"Of course I have!" Jack cried indignantly.

"I had my doubts about whether or not you were literate, to tell you the truth, Jack," Will said.

"How could you, William?" Jack said, looking deeply hurt.

"What are you two talking about?" Elizabeth asked. "_Dracula_ isn't supposed to be written yet."

"Oh, right," Will said. "Then let's have Susan,"

"No!" Jack cried. "I hate Black-Eyed Susans!"

"So you would hate our daughter if we named her Susan?" Will asked, looking over at the undoubtedly black-eyed girl.

"Did you have a bad experience with a Susan in the past, Jack?" Elizabeth questioned.

"I was referring to the flower," Jack said.

"Oh," Will said, realizing that he and Elizabeth had been a pair of idiots.

"Wait, Jack, how on earth do you know flower names, being a pirate?"

"Well, I wasn't a pirate all my life, you know," Jack informed her.

There was a silence of about three seconds. Then Jack jumped up and cried,

"I know!"

"What?" Elizabeth asked, in some alarm.

"Joyce!"

There was another silence of about ten seconds. Then Will and Elizabeth looked at each other thoughtfully.

"I like that," Will said.

"It's perfect!" Elizabeth exclaimed, jumped up, and hugged Jack, who did not appreciate it very much.

"If you're planning to strangle me in thanks, then perhaps I'd better go," Jack said, disentangling himself from Elizabeth.

"Oh, you have to stay and celebrate!" Elizabeth exclaimed.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door, and Commodore James Norrington came in. He started back when he saw Jack. Elizabeth and Will jumped between them to stand in the way of Norrington's homicidal instincts. Or rather his piracidal instincts.

"Mr. Turner, Elizabeth," he said, rather frantically. "Please move aside. I must arrest that pirate!"

"No," Will said, standing his ground. "You won't arrest anyone in this house. Please, Commodore. We were just about to celebrate the birth of our second daughter, and you might as well join us in it. But please lay aside your differences with Jack."

"I'm afraid I cannot do that, Mr. Turner." Norrington said. "Now please move away."

"No," Elizabeth said. Norrington managed to peer around them.

"Where is he?!" Norrington demanded in a scream. Will and Elizabeth wheeled around. Jack was nowhere to be seen, but a window that had been closed a moment before was swinging open. Norrington dashed past them to the window. Jack was just seen dashing away up the street.

"I'll get you, Sparrow!" Norrington yelled, swinging one leg over the windowsill. From up the street, Will and Elizabeth heard Jack's faint cry of "Captain, Captain Sparrow!" Norrington snarled violently with fury and dove out of the window, landing with a crash on the other side. Will and Elizabeth ran up to window to see that Norrington had gotten up and was running up to street after Jack, shouting,

"I'll get you, I'll get you Sparrow, if it's the last thing I do!"

"Captain Sparrow!" came Jack's voice, growing farther away yet. Norrington's scream of rage sounded fainter than before down the street. Elizabeth covered her mouth with one hand.

"Oh dear," she giggled.

**A/N: **I know Dracula didn't exist back then, but that doesn't really matter, does it? Please review!


	7. Changes for the Better

**Will and Elizabeth's Married Life as Seen by Captain Jack Sparrow**

Declaimer: if I owned PotC... I WOULD REWRITE THE SECOND MOVIE COMPLETELY!

**Changes for the Better and the Problem of 'Captain'**

"Changes ain't totally pleasant but they're excellent things"

-Anne of Avonlea

"Everybody needs a title..."

-The Sorceress of Darshiva

"Cap'n, is it? My heart, and here's promotion!"

-Treasure Island

Four months later, Captain Jack Sparrow walked up the street to the Turner's mansion. He knocked, already expecting an obnoxious, stuck-up servant. Will and Elizabeth had, as usual, fired the previous one. To Jack's intense amazement, the one that came to the door did not eye him mistrustfully, as his predecessors had done, not did he ask 'May I inquire as to your business here?', a phrase that was starting to get on Jack's nerves. Instead he bowed politely and stepped aside, saying,

"Do come in,"

Jack, too stunned to speak, moved into the hall.

"You must be Captain Jack Sparrow," the servant said. "Mr. and Mrs. Turner have talked about you a good deal. I expect you're here to see them,"

"Yes," Jack said, numbly registering that the servant had remembered the 'captain'.

"They're in the parlor," the servant said amicably.

"You mean they're not eating dinner?" Jack demanded incredulously.

"No," the servant said, slightly bewildered.

Jack walked into the parlor. Elizabeth was holding Joyce on her lap and Jack and Jackie were walking around unsteadily.

"Jack!" cried Elizabeth, Will, and Jackie at the same time. But Jackie might just have been shrieking her brother's name.

"That is one good man," Jack remarked.

"Who?" Elizabeth asked.

"Your new servant," Jack replied.

"I didn't know you admired good people, Jack," Will remarked.

"I do when they're good to me," Jack answered.

"He is a fine servant," Elizabeth said, bouncing the screaming Joyce up and down on her knee.

"So, how've you two been?" Jack asked. "I see you haven't managed to get Elizabeth pregnant again, Will."

"Jack!" Elizabeth cried indignantly. "It's been rather a mouthful around here with three children. We simply don't know what to do with them all."

"Get a dog," Jack recommended. "A big Newfoundland,"

"Why a dog?"

"Oh, they always amuse children,"

"Why a Newfoundland?"

"They're big and fluffy. And very friendly. They don't bite, as far as I know,"

"We should get one, you know, Elizabeth," Will said.

"Will. Since when have Jack's suggestions gotten us to good places?"

Everyone laughed.

"We'll get one," Elizabeth said.

"So," Jack said casually. "How's Norrington been?"

"Absolutely livid that you managed to escape, of course," Elizabeth said. "He is determined that you will never come out of this town alive again."

"You sound unconcerned for my safety," Jack remarked.

"Because we all know you'll make out just fine, Jack," Will said.

"I suppose," Jack conceded.

"How's the _Pearl_?" Elizabeth asked.

"Oh, we got a decent bit of plunder just a fortnight ago. Barely escaped the Spanish Royal Navy, though."

"Sounds like the usual Jack Sparrow adventure," Will remarked.

"_Captain_." Jack snarled. "_Captain_ Jack Sparrow."

"Why is so important, anyway, Jack?" Elizabeth asked.

"Because if you say 'Jack Sparrow' you could be talking about any Jack Sparrow, but when you say 'Captain Jack Sparrow' everyone knows you're talking about _the_ Captain Jack Sparrow. And I've earned quite a name for myself in the world of piracy."

"I doubt there's many people named Jack Sparrow, Jack." Will said.

"Well, yes, but there's also the thing with rank. Rank's important, whatever you say. And 'Captain' is just about the highest rank you can achieve as a pirate. If you say 'Captain' it implies that you have a ship, a crew,-"

"Things you didn't have for a long time," Elizabeth remarked.

"True enough," Jack said. "But 'Captain' still implies that I do, and some people won't bother looking farther than the 'Captain', and just give you whatever you want. It's those people me future depends on."

"I'm sure," Will said, rather confused.

"Well, I-" Jack suddenly froze. Norrington was walking up the street to the Turners. "Don't mind if I take the back exit, do you?" Jack asked, diving for the window. He stopped halfway out of it.

"And," he said, turning back. "Don't fire your servant." With that he jumped out of the window and ran up the street away from Norrington. Norrington walked in just in time to see Jack running away up the street. He froze.

"Sparrow!" he gasped. "Again! That's it! This time he's not getting away!" And with that Norrington ran out the door, calling to the guards.

"Oh no," Elizabeth said. "Jack's visits are always so short because of something or other."

Please review! You'll make the world a much, much, much better place!


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